Nothing ever happens

About the article I am somewhat confused …. so did she mean ask a guy out on a date?? How would you let him chase you if you are doing the asking?? I am confused …. :(

No Sherri.. you Don’t ASK a man on a date.. when you see a guy you are interested IN.. like me FRANK.. you “mentally choose him in your mind”( out of any of the guys you can have that night, YOU pick HIM), YOU let HIM CHASE YOU ( but you have secretly already picked him) and then HE thinks HE got you by asking you out, BUT ALL ALONG.. you had really ensnared HIM.. dumb git just don’t know it. YOU encourage him to CHASE you with smiles, fkirting etc… or asking him for sex in teh end like me ! ( that’s where I maybe went wrong !)

THEN.. you get to take responsibility like I do now.. by Frank NOT returning my affections..

“even though a guy’s will is highly affected/influenced (and sometimes steered) by how you act… at least IMO… ”

WELL… I GOT THAT bit wrong MAria. ha ha ha.

And yes.. like Maria, I do believe in being a bit forward.. life is too short. That’s WHY I chose Frank and was forward with him.. I saw a window of opportunity.. I was only THERE for a few days. IF he lived HERE.. I’d be letting HIM do the chasing and leading.

You didn’t get it wrong Harl, soo many other guys would have loved what you did and started chasing you because they wanted more… your lives are not compatible, that’s the problem… not what you did…

(OK, you did say no to all his suggestions and plans, but that’s another story)…

ha ha ha Maria. I KNOW I did nothing wrong… except for living in the wrong country and all the “no’s”.

AND.. if a guy wants you.. he’ll come get you. I REALLY do believe that. Look at my FWB after 18 yrs.

Thanks for sharing this article! I like it a lot. The crown, the decision about the knight.
It’s true wearing a crown is heavy, but I think not wearing one makes a suffer deeper.

The only thing that I think differently (or maybe she doesn’t talk about) is when you have feelings. Imagine you have feelings for a man, you get along great but he can’t commit for one reason. Hard to walk away, because your feelings are as strong as your crown.

Apart from that, it makes me think of a guy I met 2 weeks ago. He was super attractive, charming, I found him beautiful, at my taste etc… We met out at a party, he came talking to me, then we exchanged our numbers.
But I felt he wasn’t acting really interested (comparing to others who raised the bar high before). He texted me the day after, then many times during the week. But always just chit chat, I mean nothing concrete such a date.
Eventually, I got tired and I stopped answering him after a week (maybe the 4th time he initiated). And really I don’t care. I don’t feel I have lost anything.
There are other men out there, some who will treat me as I like, who will be interested. Men who want to play or want you to make all the effort are not Worth the time. Next! Yes, my crown is on my head! lol

Thanks Harley. I haven’t followed all about Franck, but what it seemed to me is that he wasn’t enough present.
You can do better, a man who shows you as much attention and affection as you did to him. With love and sex also!

OOH Celeste.. STOP torturing me with memories.. ha ha ha.

I may post an advert in the papers ” good looking 40-50 yr old man with looog fingers required to service a young filly ”

My mates want me to get a lifesize cardboard cut out of me, put up on our office building with” man wanted” underneath…I’m tempted !

5 days woohoo !

Yes Tam.. Frank was NOT present enough !

Ha ha.. love the cut out idea. How about the car wrap adverts they have.. he he

Sorry about Frank, Harley <3 I understand feeling disappointed about it – I don’t think you’re taking it too hard. At least you know for sure now, and you can move on.

In defence of “The Secret”, you need to listen to the audiobooks to get the effect. I saw the film years ago, and read the book, and I didn’t get it. It’s actually really powerful when you listen to it. And it doesn’t recommend being passive – the main thing it says is to put yourself in a state of feeling good – do whatever you need to do to feel good now. That feel-good feeling generates more positive experiences.

I have to say, I’ve been talking to a lot of people about it over the last six weeks, and since they’ve started listening to it too, they have all noticed weird synchronicities happening. In addition, everyone is reporting feeling more positive and upbeat!

A weird thing is happening with me too… Like I said at the start of the thread, I’ve tried for years to be a “nice person”, but underneath I resented people because I felt taken advantage of (victimised). In the last six months (since breaking up with S.) I’ve embraced my anger and have stopped being so giving, but I still felt like a victim. But then”the secret” made me realise that the victim feelings were my choice. And now I can recognise that tendency really clearly in other people… and weirdly (here’s the change) – even if people piss me off, I don’t have that critical, self righteous feeling I used to have… because I understand there are two sides to every story, and I can appreciate that the other person’s reality is just as “right” as mine. It’s strange, but the anger and bitterness in me is dying. It feels nice!

In persuit of more. Dam I am getting that on a t-shirt. Went to lunch and had good time. Very relaxed. He talked about taking us, my sister and I to vegas. Called me on his way home, talking was easy and fun.
He looked to make sure the road up the mountain was clear for us. Seemes kind of down when he realized we could not have lunch tomorrow because I would be gome. ;) teehee. Won’t see him again untill Monday. Seeing how he does at work will be intresting.
He does have a lot to prove. I am keeping my self on naked.

Vi, yeah, I know The Secret isn’t recommending passiveness, but to me it seems some people believe that it is some sort of answer to everything, and that you don’t need to create your own happiness if you believe in it. From what you have explained those people don’t get how it works though.

Harl, I think there will be turbulence in your life from Halloween to Christmas. You should totally go to Germany for Christmas, at least if you want turbulence/change in your life… and why not combine in persuit of more with just do it… you’ll be unstoppable…

Celeste, I TOTALLY agree about guitar players… looking forward to updates re your new job… it sounds promising so far…

Sherri, my dear, I’m not sure if you think Harl and I answered your question re the article… did we?

Ann, it seems you bit by bit are getting rid of Gambler guy… good for you!

Serena, where are youuuuu? Are you in Chicago?

Tam, when you have feelings for a guy who can’t commit, you simply accept that you can’t make him want something he doesn’t want.

Red, something’s definitely budding between you and Bud…

Hottie… called last night, late, but not inappropriately late. I love talking on the phone late at night, when everything is dark and quiet and you kind of lower your voice because of it… it feels so much more personal, intimate and emotional than daytime chats. We had a really nice, relaxed, quiet and cozy talk in the dark…

Hmm… I miss him… like crazy, to be honest…

What are your weekend plans girls? Tell tell tell…

Hey RED.. enjoy Estes Park adn I printed off your “men’s brains v women’s brains” story and gave it out to my friends and staff here at work………….. they creased up laughing ! It’s EXCELLENT. Am gonna frame it and put it on wall in my new hous.. maybe next year. My last house had a wall full of family pics and another in my kitchen full of vintage meal signs.. some tractors/Harley Davidsons/ special sayings and love quotes.

A REAl talking point when anyone comes to visit.