Nothing ever happens

Sounds like you did that perfectly, Mel. :)

And a belly dancing class??? That sounds super cool!

I don’t think i have ANY muscles in that area of my body to rediscover after three kids, with all three being (emergency) C-sections! lol

No muscles ANYWHERE in that General vicinity. Lol

Mel, wow get those belly dancer moves and may be if your guy has proved himself enough to you then u can show him some moves. Else you can always show the next guy ;). Harley, may be u can try to learn some belly dancing from YouTube before you go to Germany. Then you can show off to all ur mates and Frank will be so envious that he will grab you and take you away from the competition ;)

So the 38 year old messaged me speaking about the outfit he would be wearing for Halloween. I teased him a bit on it in my message. I also told him about a fundraiser my friend was having and if he could help me put it up on the meet up site as he is one of the organisers.

Here’s a question though. He hasn’t asked me out again. Does he have to or is the ball in my court I don’t really know. His message when he asked me was “Would you be interested in going out with me some time. Maybe someplace quieter so we can talk and hear each other? I’m away this weekend for a marathon but I’m back next week. We can also chat more at the Halloween party if you are going.” This was messaged on Oct 16th.

I replied “sure” and then asked him his age etc. But since then we have been chatting about other stuff so I am wondering if I side tracked his asking me out and whether now the ball is in my court to tell him which day I am free to meet. I am actually only free next week on Tuesday evening. This is the first time I have met a guy in person before chatting with him online so don’t know if the rules are different. Also he has not asked me for my number … how do the rules work in this case??

Harl, give Serena a big HI and a big HUG right back!!!

Your dress, have you tried Spanx underwear? (Google it). It sucks everything in… or go to a seamstress and ask her to move the seam and make it slightly bigger.

The Pof guys, don’t they have pics in their profiles?

Ann, seriously “crack house”?!! hahaha…

The friend story was cute… when a guy’s friends are super nice to me I usually think, OK, either he has said really nice things to them about me or they’re hoping for a threesome (or both) (I’m kidding)…

Sherri, yes, refill that ledger, or perhaps you need a short time out/breathing pause!? I agree with Harls advice re the 38 yr old.

Cleo, yeah… the on and off is not a good idea or healthy… have fun Sat night… regardless of if you meet N or not.

Phoebe, I agree sexy texts can def spice things up…

Mel, it sure sounds like he’s trying, but idk, he said he wanted to find out what he feels for another girl… and now he wants to talk… (regardless of if the girl story was true or not), what is there really to talk about after that?!! You should hear him out though… to get clarity, if for nothing else…

I talked to O last night… He has a gig 1 hour away next Sat and I will drive there and see him, and on Sun we’ll go back home together… AND THEN Sun night he will fly to Gothenburg (5 hours from Stockholm) and stay there for MONTHS and work on his album (the musicians he wants to work with are all based/live in Gbg)…

Soo… I guess next Sat will be one last night of passion, (hopefully not last, but it won’t happen again in a looong time)…

I’m not happy about this of course, but I knew from start that his career is his no 1 priority right now… I do feel a strong connection to him (and I know he feels the same)… so, who knows what will happen in the future… as always, time will tell…

Ha Maria. ..I got spanx but it was crap…so I hot a tummy tucker type thingymajig…looks Sexy
.

Cleo…you’ll drive p crazy. Am enjoying wine with my niece with her dad…my Bro. ..disapproving. .yea pof guy.. no pic !

Harley….try shapewear by Rago! I have quite a few of their pieces, and they are the best! And trust me, I’ve tried a LOT of different brands over the years…including Spanx. American Shapewear is the company that I buy most of it through, as they have the best prices overall, plus if you sign up for their email list, they frequently have 10% off deals.

Sorry about your skin. REALLY hope it clears up soon. xoxoxo

Thanks…got it. Yea…I was shocked spanx looked so bad on me !

How was everyone’s weekend? I enjoyed the weather, it was a quiet, nice weekend.

Ohh good idea Harley, get some dates while in Germany. I know you will have fun, and yeah I tried on spanx before and they never fit right. And, they are way overpriced! What color are you dying your hair?

So my bf is now acting like he did in the beginning when we first start dating. Crazy, and he actually added pics of me and him kissing and stuff on his facebook, which he never dared do before. So, maybe he is taking my threat seriously. Threat is a harsh word.

Maria, I know it will be hard not seeing him for awhile. What are you and Orlando just casual now? And, Saturday sounds like it will be a blast!

Okay so I know most of you are wondering how “our” meeting went. Well here it is down to the detail and you guys can help dissect it lol

Okay so before we were suppose to meet he sent me a message asking if I was still getting together with him today
I sent back Yep, are you still up for lunch I don’t think the weather is cooperating for a walk. (it was pouring down rain)
He sent back Yes! I was thinking the same thing great minds think alike don’t they. and then gave me a choice of what I wanted for lunch (even though he knew what I would choose lol)
So we get to the restaurant and he gives me a hug and tells me I look great. We have small chit chat. He asks if I would like to share something off the menu (I wasn’t extremely hungry)
I should add that he got a new hair cut the day before the meeting and made it a point to tell me this he also wanted my opion on it, also he was wear brand new clothes that he made a point to tell me also

So then he got to the point of asking how I was doing, I was honest I told him I was doing good, I have been busy, new dance class, stopping smoking, new gym routine, and have written a few chapters in my new book. He seemed really impressed he actually said Wow. But then he told me he hasn’t done anything, that he is depressed and he hasn’t seen anyone, mostly has been sleeping and hasn’t even done any work or done his workouts.
We did not talk about our separation, I kept things very upbeat and fun.

He did give me another hug when I was leaving and told me he had a great time seeing me, and to let him know if I get the new job or not.

I haven’t heard from him since.

However, I do believe I know a little more why this happened, this all came up in our conversation. It wasn’t a woman per se, as in she isn’t alive, his wifes birthday was the 22nd, (I looked back on my phone, he did contact me on this day to make arrangements to see me) and this is the time of year when he met her. I think that he is having survivors guilt he developed feelings for me and he is feeling guilty cause those feelings should be for her.
When he was talking about her (I have never begrudged him when he wants to talk about her she was a beautiful person inside and out) he looked me straite in the eye and said it has been 4 years, I should move on.

So anyway like I said I haven’t inciated nor have I heard from him since lunch. What do you guys think?

It wasn’t really the fact of closure, when we had our break up it was pretty up front and forward, I never had any “I don’t get it” crap.

I am not actually disappointed that we didn’t hash that stuff up, all of the advice books that I read and information from guys I know said that was a big NO NO on the first meeting. So I am glad he didn’t bring it up, cause if we are to move forward it should be on good feelings, not bad ones. He needed to see that I am still the “fun girl he loved” not moepy and teary eyed.
My guy friends all said that the fact that he didn’t bring it up was actually a good thing, it shows that he is still confused, however hopeful in renewing things. A guy who isn’t interested One wouldn’t have wanted to see me; if a guy has no interest he will not go through with seeing someone.
Second: A guy who is seriously interested wouldn’t have brought up the “sad, bad, break up” stuff because he doesn’t want to focus on the negative, he wants to focus on the positive.

Mel, good to hear about your update

Harley – u must be so excited. Counting the days? hours? minutes??

I had a tiring weekend but mostly because of my back. I had the kids. The leak was there in my apartment and I borrowed a de-humidifier from a friend to help reduce the moisture. The landlord came and removed part of my flooring to reduce the possibility of mould but now I am left with a cement floor in my kitchen!! Most of the contractors are busy at this time and he is trying to get someone to fix it. If only the contractor can decide what is the problem. Each contractor has a different theory. I am praying for this quite a bit.

I went to the doctor yesterday and got some muscle relaxer medication. It makes you drowsy. So took it last night and had a good night sleep but I am still drowsy today… Sigh.

I messaged the 38 year old giving my availability and he asked me out to dessert. So we are meeting today for dessert around 7:30. We exchanged numbers and spoke for a bit on Sunday … I have never done this before. That is gone out with a guy whom I met in a meet up group. I mean I have gone but just in a friend capacity. Would this be a date or just a friendly meet up? I am out of my element here as all I have done is online dating. So I don’t know if I should treat this as a date or as just a meet up? As in ask him the questions “when dating what are you looking for?” or just keep it friendly. I am not really nervous to meet him as he seemed like fun. But more nervous of treating it like a date if it is not. Do you understand what I mean?? If it is a date and it goes no where I am cool with meeting him at the meet up again … I am confident enough that I wont really feel awkward. But I don’t want to treat it as a date if it isn’t …. thoughts???

Meeting FWB on Friday for a couple of hours …. I was on a roll yesterday when I was messaging him … totally dirty talking LOL … He was like wow U must be really horny RFOL