Home › Forums › Did He Lose Interest? › Posting in the right place now – sorry!! Help with slow fade or is he busy?
- This topic has 2 replies and was last updated 2 years, 10 months ago by
Liz Lemon.
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Claire
Hello hello
I started messaging a guy a year ago. I thought we were just friends which I was ok with because I loved our podcast chats and sharing day to day. When he went away to train to be a fire fighter for 6 months things got sexual over texting and phone calls. And when he was back we slept together before his first placement. He then was thrown into work and his communication since then has been much different. So I wished him well on his first day in the new placement and his response was “thanks, it was a good day” since then there has been no communication. That was two weeks ago. Do I call him out? Do I text again? I just figured if he was interested he would have text no matter how busy he was but I know it’s a challenging job. Is he just busy or is this because he got sex and he is done now. Seems so weird to talk for a year to only have sex once! Especially how much we chatted. He was like my person for over a year. I’m just feeling very foolish.
Raven
Bluntly: You had a one night stand.
All of the texting & talking gave you a false sense of knowing this guy… Why did you message so much before you were able to meet?
If you were to call him out what would you say?
Liz Lemon
What do you want to call this guy out over? You had a one night stand. You weren’t dating, you had no commitment. You’re totally right that if this guy were interested, he’d be in touch, no matter how busy. A guy who is interested in a woman makes it known. No guy would go 2 weeks without contacting a woman he had a romantic interest in.
How many times did you actually hang out in person, in one year? I suspect not many. The problem is that women bond over messaging and texting, and men don’t. You say he was “your person” but I’m sorry to say I doubt he feels the same way about you. You’re probably just a nice girl to chat with, and sleep with once. Men bond over activities and seeing you in person; they can text you all day and not get emotionally attached.
I wouldn’t contact him again if I were you. I’d just take this as a lesson learned. Don’t message excessively with guys and get attached over texting. Meet in person and spend time in person if you want to date and develop a relationship.
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