Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Rebound or?
- This topic has 7 replies and was last updated 1 year, 3 months ago by Mary.
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Kaya
Backstory : I was just broken up with my ex boyfriend and wasn’t looking for something serious, so I met this guy for a FWB relationship. All was going well but I went back to my ex boyfriend and told the FWB guy I was seeing someone. After I made the decision, I regretted it immediately. A couple of months passed and of course, my ex and me broke up again so I texted my FWB asking if he wanted to meet up, but he was now started to see someone. Even though he was just a FWB, he was a respectful nice guy and one of the best looking guys I’ve been with, so it did make me upset for a while that I possibly ruined something good with the FWB. I had to mute him on social media because I regretted the decision I made with getting back with the ex.
Skip a year later, I wake up to a text from my FWB saying hi and asking how I am. He tells me him and his ex broke up 3 weeks ago, and asked me if I wanted to start hanging out again because “we had fun together”. We’ve met up once since last week, and had a good time. He said he wanted to kiss me but it’s such a strange feeling. I told him obviously it’s his choice, and didn’t pressure him, or take any offence if he didn’t. But he did, and then said he was glad he did We done everything, except for sex. His ex and him are broken up now a month, which is still very fresh but I’m more so looking for something long-term/proper relationship and I would like to be more then just FWB with him. But I don’t know if he feels the same, or just wants to have a FWB/fun. How do I go about this situation? What’s your thoughts on the situation? Is it possible to have more then just a FWB with him?
RavenSorry, You are in Rebound City…
MaddieGuys aren’t usually ready to move on 3-4 weeks after a year long relationship. Especially not with someone they view casually.
Save yourself the time and heartache by being direct. Tell him you’re looking for more this time around and enjoy your connection with him, so you’d be down to date for real in the future if he’s ready and interested. But otherwise, you’re not in the same place as you were last time and not looking to start up something casual again.
He will likely bail, or try to sweet talk you into staying casual, and walking away from either of those outcomes will be good. Because you’ll knows you did right for yourself in saying what you wanted and did not waste your own time.
KayaThank you Maddie, this makes sense. I appreciate your reply and will take on your advice. I think it’s for the best.
KashYou should tell him what you are looking for. If he isn’t okay with it now then he can contact you when he is. Till then you stop contact. This is what I would do.
KashAnd ofcourse go about your life. Keep looking for what you want
MaryYou didn’t lose anything. You are seeking validation from men and it can only come from wuthin for a relationship to work. The fwb can see that and onky wants sex and not a gf bf relationship with you.
I hope this helps you to grow.
Mary*within
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