Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Relationship vs FWB
- This topic has 6 replies and was last updated 2 years, 4 months ago by
Carrie.
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A
Why do some people always get into a relationship when they meet someone they like and others who can’t ever make it past the friends with benefits zone? I don’t think it has anything to do with looks because I’ve seen average looking girls always “get the guy” and hot girls just getting used and vise versa.
Raven
It depends there are so many variables…
FYI- FWB is a ruse.
Amy s
Most girls that agree to fwb are settling. They like the guy and are settling for his breadcrumbs. In my opinion the more
Easy going you are the easier the relationships are. That being said the good looking girls can attract the douche guys. I would also say that some people jump from relationship to relationship which shows they are just dating because they can’t be alone. Lots of moving parts. Just take things easy and let it
Happen and
Don’t overthink and you will
Be fine.Maddie
Agree with Amy. Women who want and end up in relationships walk away if the guy is offering less. They may seem to always get the guy because you only see the ones they choose to stick around for and not the ones who try to approach them casually and fail. Because those women walk so quickly that the guys who are inconsistent or putting in low effort or otherwise have no plans to commit aren’t even worth mentioning.
Just keep looking for your right match and don’t settle for a situation you don’t want just to keep a guy around. If you know what you want, don’t waste your time on someone who doesn’t want the same things.
Mary
A girl has to be right with herself and not in a place that they are seeking to be validated/attaching a guy to her sense of self worth.
Yes, it is a ruse. If you want a relationship, say no to fwb.
lane
An FWB doesn’t work when a woman (or man) uses it to try and snare someone into a relationship. That’s game playing whereas a healthy relationship shouldn’t start off with games as that’s a losing bet, and why so many woman who play the “FWB” or even “dating game” fail when they try to use sex to catch a man—all you will catch are unrequited feelings if they had/have no desire to be in a relationship with you.
It is perfectly OK to be in an FWB when you have no desire to be in a relationship and able to remain detached (key word). After I ended my 20+ year marriage, I had zero desire to be in a relationship so it worked well for me during a major transition period/stage of my life. It can work as long both parties mutually agree to it, upfront (no games), but when one stops, it ends just like any other form of friendship or relationship. BTW my two FWB’s treated me very well, so I disagree with the breadcrumb theory, that’s a personal boundary problem.
Honestly it comes down to one’s mindset and attitude by refusing to settle for anything less than one wants, needs, or deserves. Just because people “like each other” (heart goes pitter patter) is not a guarantee they stay together whether it starts off as dating, a relationship, or even an FWB—it ultimately comes down to how well the couple gels and their mutual (key word) desire to stay together until one, or both, decides to end it. That’s pretty much it in a nutshell.
Carrie
Hi, I believe men love to have what they cannot get! When a woman is there for them in every aspect except sex, I feel men cannot understand it, and they want to know more about that women until it is the guy chasing the women around. Let them have the friendships with benefits if that’s what they both desire, however, in a man’s heart I believe it is not. I have a son, 37, and we talk about these issues all the time. Best of luck to you! Carrie
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