"So.. are you a virgin?"

Daisy, is this a deal breaker question for you? When I was dating and men would ask on the first date if I rented or owned my home, it was an automatic disqualifier, no further questions asked. Simply unacceptable to be asking that at that stage and no recovery from it. I took a hard line on it and I’m glad I did.

If it is, I’d suggest saying that in your experience that question coming up so soon is a deal breaker for you and you are bowing out and wish them the best.

If it’s not a deal breaker then tell them you feel uncomfortable with that question and would rather discuss further down the line in the dating relationship.

It’s up to you. For me, it would be a deal breaker, but it’s your life and your decision.

From my own experience, I’ve noticed guys that ask such an intimate question so early on NEVER have good intentions.

Fancynancy, that is an interesting thought. I didn’t realize that this more then likely is a dealbreaker for me.

Kay, as soon as I received that question via text I was completely turned off.. but then he keeps asking so when can I see you again? Just wondered if maybe I’m overreacting here. I think you two have helped me realize this is a dealbreaker for me.. I feel like I’ve learned from past experience that when a guy asks such a question so early on he enjoys breaking boundaries and doesn’t have the greatest intentions moving forward.

Can you two help me draft a final text to this guy as to tell him I’m uninterested?

You are not overreacting, Daisy. But more importantly, it doesn’t actually matter if you’re overreacting or not. The guy turned you off. You don’t need a better reason than that not to go out with him again.

Why do you feel like you owe him an explanation? If you want him to know you’re not interested, not responding to any of his texts will do the trick. But if you prefer responding, the next time he asks when he can see you again, maybe say something very brief, like “No thanks!”

I actually would keep it that brief–you don’t owe him an explanation. Once you say no thanks, ignore ANY texts from him. If he keeps sending them after you tell him no thanks, he’s not respecting your boundaries. He’s already shown he doesn’t (especially when he told you how you “should” be) so expect him to ignore your wishes.

It’s awesome to know what your deal breakers are!!

Hi Daisy,

If a guy asked me such a rude questions I would look shocked and ask him what he wanted that information for since I just met him. Was he writing a book?

I would never see that person again…too rude.

I’m so happy to hear that, Daisy!

You’re welcome!

Hey, Daisy,

I’m into that online dating thing as well, and all I can say is it’s quite an experience!

I’ve had two guys try to get me to go back to their place after the first meeting. Is that not creepy? One guy thought he was so slick — he asked if I wanted to go for ice cream. I said sure, and he ordered a quart to go. As we were walking, he pointed to an expensive car parked on the street and said, that’s mine. Then pushed the lock button on his keys a few times to prove it. He was so arrogant.

Another guy that I had exchanged a few texts with asked one day if I wanted to come to his apartment to play beer pong with him and his roommate. I had never met him! I guess there are girls that would say yes to that and he figured if he asks enough girls he’ll eventually hit the jackpot.

Anyway, if a guy asked if I’m a virgin, that would be a total turnoff. I know why I’m on that site, and it sure as hell isn’t for booty calls.