The guy i'm seeing only contacts me to set our dates? he hasn't kissed me yet.

Hi Luisa,

I don’t think that he’s playing games. I think one on one interaction in person is way better than texting throughout the day, but that’s just opinion. The fact that he is contacting you to actually see you in person to get to know you is awesome!

I see nothing wrong with you texting him saying you couldn’t think of anywhere because you’re new to the city and ask if he’s thought of anywhere to go. xo

I wouldn’t worry too much about the kiss yet, imo. I say, wait and see how your next date goes. You’re still getting to know each other and it sounds sweet. xo

But don’t you guys think its strange the no texting part?

I guess it’s a matter of personal preference.

You see ladies on this forum all the time talking about a guy who is texting them constantly but never making plans to see them or making plans but not following through. I think your situation is far more desirable and that any one of those ladies would prefer to have dates set rather than texting throughout the day. I understand why you want to have both and that may evolve but for now just enjoy the time you get to spend with him :)

Well, I let the man lead usually. However, if I were you at this point I would shoot him a text asking if we were meeting on Friday and the place and time as you were trying to make plans for the weekend. If you do not hear back from him by Friday morning then make your own plans. And if he comes back to you let him know that since you did not hear from him you made your own plans. That will do one of two – either will teach him to make more concrete plans with you (which is great) or he will step out and decide not to date you anymore (this usually happens if the guy is not really thinking too seriously of you but more in a casual way).

If he decides to step out then it was never meant to be and you saved a lot of time from being wasted on him.

He should have contacted you latest on Wednesday if you pre-agreed for Friday. Not nice, pay attention and definitely do not offer a kiss. This is a guy’s job to initiate physical things, do not offer it to him on a silver platter, he will not value you and will start taking things for granted.

This is one of a very good screening tools: does you guy take your kindness/affection for granted? Meaning texts you less, stops being attentive, does not have to work as hard…f you notice that, do not invest in him.

It’s interesting what you are saying Maria.

I was dating this guy eons ago and thought that he was into me. But he told me right up front that he didn’t like to talk on the phone but preferred text. Though I’m not much into text except if I am in the mood, I accepted that between us it would only be texts. We stopped dating a few weeks into it as he gave me the “I’m not ready for a relationship” line. We did keep in touch as he is a really nice person.

I recently met him to catch up after over a year. He told me about this girl he was dating for 3 months whom after he described I told him didn’t you realize she was a gold digger. He actually paid her son’s Soccer fees which is quite a bit because she asked him to with no promise of pay back or anything. She just expected him to because he was dating her. (I do not believe a woman should expect a guy to pay expenses which are her responsibility and this was totally against what I believe in).

However this made me realize how minimal his interest was in me as he was not even interested in talking on the phone with me whereas he paid her son’s Soccer fees.

It gave me an interesting insight into a guy’s mind. Let’s say a social experiment ;)

Luisa,
He’s said right here why he doesn’t text much.
“However, I must say he mentioned that he doesn’t text much unless he has something to say.”

Don’t get in your head about this. I see so many women having conflicts on how much or how little a guy is texting. It’s really not important. What’s important is the quality time you are spending to bond. He seems interested hence asking and setting up dates ahead of time. I bet the conversations have been of quality too because you haven’t spent hours texting before hand.

Allow the relationship to flow naturally. If, he goes in for a kiss great if he doesn’t you can wait it out. Don’t rush things. Honestly, I would find it refreshing to be around a gentleman who is pacing the relationship.

Perfect! Short and sweet :)

Hey girls,

so he contacted me suggesting dinner and drinks in an area of the city. I agreed and we said that we should meet at 8. I said that “I was looking forward to see him” and he read it but didn’t respond, I hope i wasn’t too eager…

But anyway, any tips for the third date??

thanks!

If women started thinking that the man is even lucky to date her… This would not be an issue!

Honestly? I only became successful in relationships and men wanting me, when I stopped worrying about this nonsense.

Great advice XYZ!