Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Unmatched after Date- but still texting
- This topic has 9 replies and was last updated 5 years, 7 months ago by
Lane.
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Daisy
My first post- eek!
Met this guy on Bumble. Had a nice first date on Weds. He works a bit of an odd schedule, doesn’t get off work until after 9p. He texts me Friday during the day about possibly meeting up after my plans were done that night. We meet up by me and end up just hanging out at my place. He slept over (no sex though). The next morning he gave me a really nice kiss goodbye. I then go back on Bumble and I notice that at some point between Fri and Sat AM he unmatched me! Was a bit bummed, but then he just randomly text a few hours later and we have a little conversation.
What’s the point of unmatching then? Does anyone out there do this when they’re actually interested in the person? I always thought it was kind of sending a message like “don’t want to hear from you again”. Thoughts?
Wow
Who knows, but why are inviting a guy to your home to spend the night? A total stranger! Very dangerous . Plus the guy should be trying to impress you and take you on dates not come hang out and sleepover. I would not keep texting him unless he asks you on a real date.
Raven
I don’t understand why you need to stay matched I’d you’ve met & vibed & he’s still in touch…
Raven
& yes, stop it with the slumber parties!
Lurker
I was only on Bumble very briefly and never used Tinder, but when you unmatch with someone the conversation disappears, right? If he’s talking to multiple women (which he probably is) maybe he’s just trying to keep his inbox uncluttered? If you’ve moved on to texting he wouldn’t see the need to keep you in his matches, I would guess.
Agree with all the advice above. If you’ve met and person and he’s texting, don’t worry about the unmatching. And more importantly — no more sleepovers with total strangers, with him or any other guy. AND he should be courting you and trying to impress you, not just hanging out and sleeping over, so sit back and see if he offers to take you out.
Louise
I’ve only had one guy unmatch me while we were chatting and trying to set up a date and he asked me something about his appearance and I said I could no longer see his pics seeing as he’d unmatched me and then he ghosted (blocked me), obviously a player lol
Whereas my ‘guy’ (what do you call a long term Fwb you’ve started dating?!) keeps us matched for sentimental reasons- our first conversation.
I think it shows you where his head is at – you’re one on a list.
carli
“what do you call a long term Fwb you’ve started dating?!”
future ex-boyfriend
Louise
Carli – Haha nice one
Andrea
Not sure if Bumble works like some of the other sites, but perhaps he didn’t want you to be able to tell when he’s online looking for other women.
Lane
Seriously, stop bringing men to your place!!! He doesn’t want to date you, he wants to have SEX with you! He’s thinking: “Oh well, she didn’t put out the first time but I’ll keep this one e-tethered (on the hook) and eventually get a free hookup out of her.” SEX is on his mind, not dating you!
MEN LOVE SEX so don’t think for one minute that’s not what they are thinking of when you invite them to your place! So what, you didn’t put out the first time but you PRESENTED A PICTURE that you easily bring home male strangers so IN THEIR MIND they believe you do this often and put out easily. Whether you do or not doesn’t matter to them, its the PRESENTATION and IMAGE you project to men and in their mind if they give you some ‘text attention’ they will eventually get invited over for sex.
If you want to be treated like a lady who’s worthy of being properly courted, then I highly suggest you read books on the subject like the owner of this sites book “Men aren’t Complicated”; “Think Like a Man but ACT like a Lady”; “The New Rules..” etc. before you swipe on another man’s profile.
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