Home › Forums › Texting Advice › Ways to stop yourself from texting them?
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Liz
Hey ladies. I’m trying to give a guy space as he figures out what he wants to do with our relationship but I can’t help and get the urge to text him. I’ve reached out once but I don’t want to do it again. I would rather wait for him. So what are some good techniques to get yourself to not text him?
whiskeyagogoDon’t tell yourself that you’re powerless over this. By saying “how do I stop myself” from texting him – you’re acting like you’re powerless to the urge to text him.
You just don’t text him. That’s it. Each time you want to pick up the phone, put it back down and do something else. Read Eric’s articles 100 times if you have to, and remind yourself that every time you text him, you’re acting needy. Don’t be needy. Do something else other than texting him.
AprilOur mind is the most powerful thing in the world. Mind over matter, as what they say. Keep on thinking that you should NOT text him. When you feel the urge, use your mind to think about other things. It’s all about having the right mindset.
patsytshirtit takes time to learn how to suppress the urge. You have to substitute this action with something more productive. Maybe whenever you want to text him, you could come here on this forum and reply some posts. You could text a friend or text yourself instead (I know it sounds crazy but I used to send myself long texts, emails, facebook etc instead of texting any guy, it helped me).
CiCiCome to this forum, read books on giving a guy space or any other self help book, meet someone for dinner after work, make new friends, think of a new exciting hobby…
:)RoseI used to go crazy trying not to text, I guess practice makes perfect. What I did was getting my phone out of sight, distract myself with anything but what really made me quit texting was the fact that I was only hurting myself. The ultimate method is deleting his number, If he’s really interested he will text and you can make him your contact again. Now I never initiate texting, I only respond and works very well. They really don’t care if you don’t initiate if they really, really like you.
MimiI use the notepad thing on my phone to journal what I’m thinking instead of texting. If it were up to me, I’d text my BF all day long, but he’s not a texter, so I respect that and look forward to talking to him instead. Journaling helps me get out the feelings that I have. It works!
EMDelete his phone number from your phone if you haven’t memorized it already. For future reference, you can write it somewhere that is hard to reach or give it to your friend who will only give it to you when he contacts you back.
Fransiscahi Liz.. i did like Rose.. i delete his number since i wasnt sure that i can handle not to text him or sending him funny video.. and u know what? its really works.. after 8 days.. he came back to me and said how much he missed me.. and when we met.. he definitely threat me like princess and i was really in a cloud because i knew it 100% from him. i think you should try..
meanwhile.. do your best for your self.. live happy life.. hanging out with your good friends.. do everything that make u will feel good.. so when he come back.. u give him your best self.. i am sure it will be irressistable for him????LizWell he replied finally. He asked what time I get done with class last night around 11. Since I was going to bed I texted him when I got off work at 10:30 this morning and said I would be done around 4:30. I haven’t heard back from him though but I’m going to wait and try out all of your guys advice so I don’t text him.
tallladyWhat is he trying to decide?
JennyBest way to stop yourself from texting… Go out with someone else *the more better looking, the better*, read, hang by the pool, hang with friends, workout, go check out a show, volunteer, walk your dog, listen to music, go shopping, hang w family, give painting or the piano a shot… Pretty much just do anything to keep you mind distracted until you’ve achieved the ability to have a little more self-control ;)
LizTalllady- I gave him space because he wasn’t sure how he felt about me and if he wanted a girlfriend or not.
LizUpdate: I texted him after class to see if he wanted to meet but he had a terrible migraine. He, however, asked if we could meet tomorrow. I said I would let him know after I was done with class. What should I text him tomorrow when I’m done to see if he would like to meet? I don’t want to seem pushy even though I really want to see him.
RoseIf you really like this guy, stop pursuing him, he’ll run away. Don’t text him anymore.
patsytshirtyou’re texting too much, don’t be a text gnat. Let him text you. he should exercise his fingers too
ClaireIf I’m in that situation I just delete their number, if they really want to get in contact they will….
CJUST STOP TEXTING! Don’t ask, don’t say hellow, don’t just don’t. If you fell like you need to talk to someone, just send a nice text to your parents, a dear friend you haven’t spoken to in a long time, but don’t text him! if he texts you, take at least 5 hours to respond, make responding to him the last thing to do in your dayly chores and if it gets to late, simply don’t do it that day, you have to give yourself value, you have to make yourself hard to reach, not all available for him, if he decides to come back for a relationship, the fact that you where available all the time will make him think he can be lazy and you won’t get a caring loving boyfriend. On the other hand if he sees he has to work to earn spending time with you he will value it more and if he decides to come back for a relationship, he would put effort because he would have been forced to see the value you have, THE VALUE YOU GIVE TO YOURSELF.
soniI just delete the no when I feel I may get tempted to text. that’s what I did infact last week. there is this guy who reconnected wid me after 2 months of silence. I was polite and frndly. but told him next day I dint like the way you cut off and chose to walk away 2 mnths back. so if you want to be back again u will have to put in more efforts. after just 3 days he disappeared again. lol. I didn’t bother and simply deleted him from my phone. after 5 days I heard from him. where did u go?? I didn’t reply immediately and waited till evening to respond. and that was also just an impersonal “hey there”. usually I make it easy because I take the conversation forward. this time I didn’t. so it just got stuck at that point. but that’s ok. if he wants me he has to try harder. I am not making it easy for him. and if he decides to not bother, that’s fine too. m not going to invest myself too much emotionally or mentally till I see some efforts from him.
its only after coming on this forum I have realised and somehow found the strength to stick to some basic rules. and one of them is not to chase or pursue to seek answers or whatever…
let him get in touch. he will for sure. wait. and when he does, be polite and frndly. let him invest more, make more efforts..
AyuHi Liz! We have the same case! What is it with these men, wanting time and space to sort their sh*t out! (sigh)..
Indeed it is hard not to text them. But it is harder not to text them back! What I did was I ‘end chat’ him from the chat room, so I don’t get to see his name every time i open whatsapp. Deleting his number or blocking him for me is quite a childish move.
The difference between your man and mine is, mine declared he needs time and space but cannot stop texting me all day like normal! One big fat weird breakup ever!
Hang on there, Liz!redcurleysueFrom an article I read about texting:
Remember the feeling you get when you DON’T get the response you want from a text. Think about it. Where does it live in your body? Your gut? Your chest? Feel it now. Then, ask yourself, do I want to have this feeling? Is it worth it?
JamesLauren Conrad said it best, “As soon as you stop thinking about them, they’ll send you a text message or they’ll call you because they know you just stopped thinking about them. It’s like a radar.”
MistralGo out and do your own thing. As soon as you are not obsessing over him, he’ll feel the change in the vibe and start pursuing you.
To give you an example: My boyfriend is not a big caller/texter especially since we live close by. When he couldn’t see my car in my parking spot, and it was getting late (11 PM), boy did he blow up my phone texting and calling and leaving messages for me to call him when I got home…haha.
I was at the casino having fun and WINNING… :) I collected my winnings at 11:45 and then texted him saying I was headed home now. :P
THAT’S how you get to feeling good and having THEM go crazy waiting for a response from you…you don’t play games, you just go out and do your OWN THING…you reply if you’re not busy, you don’t reply right away if you are busy…pretty much common sense.
KalikaI am having the same problem. And I think writing your thoughts down in your diary or your phone really does help. I’ve been doing that to keep me from texting my crush.
AnonRose I also deleted the guy’s number. I made it so much easier. I would no longer feel the temptation and I realised that since its now out of my hands I relaxed. If the guy then texted me, I would know that he did it because he wanted to, not because he felt he needed to respond to my text.
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