We texted every single day, all day long. Now less often. What's his deal?

Sorry – nothing wrong with him instead

We texted every single day. He would text me saying “good morning” and “good night.” We’d talk all day long about random things.

^ this is definitely not sustainable long term. Guys usually text that much when they’re in the getting to know you phase. After that, they realise they need to settle back into their normal routine.

When I first started talking to the guy Im seeing we would send the cute random messages during the day and then text a whole bunch at night and it was good. It is a way to show that your interested but after so long it just can’t be that way, and while you might think it means he not interested that might not be the case. If you texted a bunch then you got to know him, you like him, now is the action part. Your not going to have a relationship with your phone but with him.
The articles on here about texting are so worth reading. Don’t put so much thought into what texting means, don’t get upset if he doesn’t respond, and don’t sit with your phone in your hand. You will drive yourself crazy. Go by his actions.

Thanks for the replies and advice everyone!!

A man leads. How he is leading, mirror and see what you feel.

That is how he feels.

How long has it been since you had a “good” conversation? If it’s a couple of days or weeks, I’d wait for him to start texting. Guys hate it when women message when he’s clearly being unresponsive. It comes off as needy.

i’d say it’s been about a week since i’ve had a good conversation. i just backed off, thinking he was not into it. gave him his space to do whatever. no initiating texts or plans so i just left it alone, but don’t know if it’s completely needy to text something playful or fun. i tend to stay away from that stuff and let the guy come to me, but i get a slight feeling and wanted to see what you ladies thought.

If you feel he might have a feeling you are not interested, then text him something funny, some link to a funny video clip or something like that. And say “where have you been handsome? haven’t heard from you in a while..”.

There is nothing wrong in asking the guy directly, in a non demanding manner, especially if things changed noticeably and within a short period of time. But next time, you should be the one to back up from incessant texting. I find that younger guys like to text a lot, but they also like to reply whenever they are pleased, and this is not ok with me. So I usually say something like that “sorry I didn’t get back to your earlier, I saw a few texts from you, I am not ignoring you, I had to do this and that and wanted to reply properly when I am free”. This way a person does not feel offended that you are ignoring them but they also get an understanding that texting all the time is not what you want.

You don’t always have to mirror them, because if they ignore you and you ignore them, then there will be nothing to mirror very soon. You do need to let them understand that ignoring is no ok. And the best way to do that is via your own actions and your own communication style, if you are open, polite and respectful of the guy, a decent guy (or gal for that matter) would reciprocate in kind and you won’t have to wonder later why this or that.

**HELP**

I’ve been reading through this thread, and its made a few things clearer for my situation, so thank you very much ladies :)

So a little bit about my situation, i met him (Norman) online about 4-months ago (I know it’s a long time and we haven’t met in person yet, but he lives quite far. I actually hinted while i was in his City over Xmas, but he either didn’t get the hint, or thought it was too soon then)

So we started off talking loads over text, everyday and late into the night (He was on annual leave from work then too, so that explains him having a lot of time on his hands then) then it got a little less the less again, now its just now and again.

As it got less and less, i thought he wasn’t interested, but now I’m getting mixed signals, cause he still pops in with random comments to my snap story, with a lot of banter and he can flirt a little now and again too, we take the mick out of each other a lot (whenever we do talk).

So after about 2 weeks of no proper conversation, he remembered my birthday (I was convinced that he’s just popped it in his phone when we first talked about birthdays which was about 3-months before that, until one of my male friends (Owen) said that no guy remembers the birthday of someone who is not their immediate family or group of friends) Is that true??

After talking to Owen about his random comments, his bit of flirting, remembering my birthday, not talking constantly but not quite letting go either……Owen thinks he likes me but is a bit of a chicken, or finds it difficult to talk to women.

When we first started talking, we both said what we were after and that we weren’t looking to rush into anything, should i drop him a text and just say that i like him, and see what happens or do you think that’ll freak him out a bit (Cause it has been 4-months now, he was little cheesy when we started texting, so i didn’t think I’d like him, but i do)

Should i tell him?

Really appreciate your advice ladies, Thank you!

just reading your title made me tired………….whoa, slow down partna :)

I’d be relieved if his texting slowed down after all of that. Who can humanly keep up? think about it. get a life already? is there nothing else your fingers can do?

agreeing with other posters, there is a lot of articles on texting in this forum from Eric. they make sense and would make a good read if you care to. Bottom line is the initial stages like up to 2 months I think is where you get a lot of texting in but it really is irrelevant as a way to measure the friendship/relationship per se. Personally if I”m on break with family I don’t check in with my guy that often either, am too busy having fun. I may call later in the evening when things die down or early morning b4 things begin but def not all day, everyday.

It’s normal. No one has time to text that much and quite frankly, it’s a red flag when a guy wants to do that. It tells you he’s desperate and/or has nothing better to do ’cause men who have it going on don’t have time for that nonsense. I would only respond when he texts you first and let him set the pace for how frequently he wants to communicate. Rest assured, this is totally normal and you should be relaxed and glad he’s a “normal” guy not a needy mess who wants to be glued to you 24/7!

Every two to three days I would short text him – something like “Thinking of you today”

Or, “You know I am here for you.”

I would do that without response for about three weeks….and then I would stop.

If you hear nothing it is time to drop communication until he opens it up on his end.