What is the best way to handle this with dignity and class?

Sophie-I think some people were mean on here ( no excuse for their name calling etc.) but mainly because you just were not getting the points we were making or you wanted different advice.
To break it down-you are over-reacting because some crap things ,including your friend dying have happened.
The guy is either an out-right lying jerk or wishy-washy or changed his mind. This is not unusual-there are lots of jerk guys around. We are not saying it is right for guys to do that, but it is what it is in this case and ranting on and wanting to text him about it is just giving him more chance to hurt you or screw you around again, so to speak. Also, you need to take some ownership that you trusted him too soon. Possibly too,you are arrogant and that attracts the same-just a thought. Anyway-move on, grieve and good luck in the future-do not let him make you cynical-just take more time to know someone before you trust.

Also, Tallspicy…what do you mean by men will be men? That being a “man” equates to lying and deceiving women for sex? In other words, if a man did this to you, you would brush it off with a “boys will be boys” or “i should have known”attitude?

Hi Pip…where did I name call?

I also didn’t say anything about name calling in my post…..

Pip, I read this entire thread and you are one of the worst offenders. You came on and posted a LOL and told her to go and buy a funeral outfit as if the death was funny for you. I am not suprised she got very upset and intense. I also found myself extremely offended by your very cruel comments.

Y’all are relentless!

OP is long gone.

My point was focus on the important things like the death of a friend, not the fact some three date guy decided to talk your pants off (literally).. life is too short to worry about a man you don’t even know. Yet she focused more energy on here than I would have thought if she lost a dear friend. Go live life, console her fAily and friends, and stop obsessing because whom ever guy tricked you. I seriously wdon’t update not be worried about some guy I said I didn’t even like right now, if I had grieving to do and the opportunity to be supporting her family and friends. That whacked.

It read back to me like a lot of people did that t.

The consensus seems to be that this is how men behave and to just accept it and smile and not trust people in future. I am not sure how that’s helping anyone.

The cruel comments to someone after a death though is disappointing even for the internet

All she did wrong was believe a man

Yes, believe a total stranger u chatted with for two weeks and met online!!!

Believe everything people tell you. That’s the trick to life and going somewhere. Believe whatever you read, see or hear!!! No one shmatter our ever believe a person could lie.

Anyone want to buy some real estate in Florida, near the Everglades? Waterfront view! Pets allowed , but mind the alligators. Believe me! It’s worth every dime. Send me your check now and I’ll send you your property title. Money order or bank check only please.

Were*

You don’t inherently trust someone unless they prove they are worthy of your trust. And if you read enough on here you know that there are thousands of women meeting men on th Internet with shady intentions. But women just TRUST and don’t think with their heads. That’s my point … you don’t trust someone just because they say it, have them prove it over time before you jump all in.

If not.. the only person you can blame is you. And like it or not, people have their own agendas in life. People don’t do things unless it benefits them. Sometimes those intentions or what they get are not honest or altruistic. This the stranger /danger warning.

Texting and chatting give a false sense of intimacy and knowing someone. Words are just words and you have no idea when a person says something that it is true. Truth comes out over time. Which is why you wouldn’t buy property sight unseen or trust that some stranger you started dating is who he says he is.

I think there is a big difference between trust and giving someone the benefit of the doubt. All you can do in dating is look out for red flags and try and ask questions. Sophie walked when he showed his true colours and I agree he was wrong to contact her and was very insensitive in his communication. Reading his messages I wondered if he was autistic or on the spectrum because he was very overly blunt. It is fine to have points but the way you express them was upsetting for me to read.

I think Pip and Jen are the same person. Same voice.