When is it a rebound?

& why the fights & problems?

Oh honey. That is a self harm question that literally had no value other than painful thoughts

Better question: what did I learn? What will I choose differently next time? How can I self soothe through my pain?

Food for thought for future relationships Lisa – no one “makes” you insecure. That’s victim language. You are solely responsible for your response to people and situations. If you’re “kinda sensitive” and it’s destroying your relationships, strongly suggest you see a therapist to resolve that issue.

What if he was on the rebound? What if he wasn’t? You two were incompatible and he’s gone. That’s the bottom line. Don’t torture yourself with this pointless question.

No, he was with you for 3 years. People can change in that long a period of time. You two had your own issues and broke up. If he eventually reconnected with her and found their circumstances were different and/or one or both had changed and grown up in all that time apart and were more compatible than before / timing was just good now, then their relationship was entirely unrelated to and separate from yours and had nothing to do with rebound or not.

Take the good advice from the other posters, and do not look for ways to view what happened in the way that positions you in the most negative of lights. You’re in a painful situation, but dragging yourself further down will keep you stuck and unhappy. You deserve better than being down on yourself and can get through this!