Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › When should I reach out?
- This topic has 5 replies and was last updated 4 years, 3 months ago by
Baru.
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Baru
Hi,
So I’ve been seeing this guy for almost a year now. Everything had been going great lately. We work in a same company (not directly together) and we also spend most of the weekends together. He usually texts me every day, even at work, when we sit two rooms apart, and even when he goes away with his friends. I knew he’s going on a vacation, sailing with his friends starting this Friday. That was the last time he texted me. Just saying they arrived in the city, where they’ll be sailing from and then we texted about some restaurant we both like and nothing since then. I don’t wanna freak out, because he’s barely online and probably somewhere in the middle of the sea. I’m just not used to not being in contact with him and I was thinking of just asking how the trip is going tomorrow. Is it too soon or should I wait for him to reach out to me? As I mentioned earlier, this is not his typical behaviour, so I’m little bit confused about, what to do.
Newbie
You got to stop. When everything is fine and you freak out he missed a day of texting its really a sign you got too dependant on him. Which tells you to find more stuff to do for yourself that will help you keeping this relationship. Find your own hobby
He has very good motives of why he cant reach out. He is at see with friends. So why in the world do you need to ask him now how its going. Sure that can wait a day. Plus WiFi is not everywhere you know or 4GCarla
I would not worry. Probably wifi/4G issue. Or dropped his phone into the sea. Anyway, you have been seeing him for long, you know where he is, it is not like he is ghosting you….relax. If he has been online, that means you don’t actually have to worry about his safety. So stop being needy, nothing is wrong he is chillaxing.
Baru
Thank you guys! :) All your replies helped me to realise I was freaking out for no reason… Now I feel better about it and I’ll wait for him to reach out when he can/feels like it. ;)
Lane
You have been together long enough that there should be some calmness in your relationship. Listen I get, I’m a professional dealing with partners (ex husband and current SO) being away for long periods of time because of theirs jobs. I could go WEEKS without hearing from my ex-husband who was deployed to a lot of hotspots over our 20+ year marriage; and my current partner who goes out to sea for a few months at a time where the satellite on the ship has gone out for a few days.
You know what I did in these situations? NOTHING. They will get back to you the moment they can, they always do, so don’t freak out unless its been over a month, at which point a call to the Coast Guard may be warranted if your BF had a ‘timeline’ to the next destination. If you have an itinerary and there’s been no major weather events where he’s sailing about, then worrying isn’t going to help you, or him. Just believe he’s OK and he’ll be OK :0)
Baru
He already reached out yesterday in the evening! :) So I know he’s having fun and is save, I’m happy for him. Thanks for all of your input, I know I was just overwhelmed in my own mind. I still have some trust issues to deal with from my previous relationship. And my current guy keeps proving, that I can trust him. <3
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