Home › Forums › Decoding His Signals / How Does He Feel About Me? › Why is he ignoring me but looks at my snapchat stories?
- This topic has 65 replies and was last updated 7 years, 7 months ago by
Karine.
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Stefanie
Tessa, I’m not clear why you are “semi-reluctant” to end it. Just cut it and move on, why don’t you at this stage? This guy isn’t going to play the way you want him to. This is a lot of to’ing and fro’ing and fussing over a FWB arrangement. You’re coming across as way more into this than you are admitting. It isn’t about manners any more, it’s about getting him to do what you want him to do when you want him to and yes certainly one would think it would be reasonable to expect some consideration from a sex buddy but he ain’t the one gonna give that to you sweetie. Hate to see you stuck in this loop. As he said, you’re a pretty girl, you can find someone else pretty easily that will be more to your liking.
Tessa
But why the hell is he playing games? If he’s done, can’t he just clearly say that?
Stefanie
Oh Tessa. You’re strung out on trying to figure out someone else’s mind and behavior, which will drive you berserk 100% of the time.
For him he isn’t playing a game. He is looking at this arrangement quite a bit differently from you, that much IS clear. He probably doesn’t think there is anything specific to end. This is very, very casual for him.
Make some sense? You’re going to just have to LET THIS GO. You just want what you can’t have. That’s normal human behavior. But you CAN control what you choose to focus on. What do you WANT, in the positive? Start focusing on that and this will go away.
Tessa
Haha I’m a control freak and I think having bad anxiety this week is really not helping!
I’m so glad I read your response when I did because it gave me a big kick up the ass. I end up writing “Sorry I’m aware I’m acting like an annoying needy little bitch, I do it when I want attention. That’s not a reflection of you. I have had mad fun the last few months & I really enjoyed actually being able to detach for once. I’m going to quit pushing you to hangout, you do whatever the fuck you wanna do, that’s the whole point of casual. If you wanna watch a movie or whatever then shoot me a text, if not then awesome I’m cool with that x” and I feel soooo much better and in control now.
You were 100% right and I think I got caught up in the whole drama of problem solving. Sometimes being constantly stressed makes these situations worse than they should. Lesson learnt.. Casual does not work for me!
Stefanie
YAY! Three cheers for you. Handled like a newly minted girl in control of herself. Well done!! Glad you feel better. That’s all that counts.
Tessa
Thanks Stef, really appreciate it & all your help :)
Lovatic2401
I have kinda the same problem. I have a guy that I met he was kinda desperate and asked me if I co be his girlfriend. Over springbreak we always talked. But now in school days we don’t talk. He always post stories in his snapchat. And he looks at my stories but he doesn’t text me to say hi or how you doing. I don’t feel like I sho text him untill he text me cause I don’t want to seem thirsty. It has been 2 days he hasn’t texted me should I worry am I just a play toy to him. Cause he wanted me I was just hopping to be friends.
Ivette
What if you’re supposedly boyfriend check your Snapchat’s but don’t texts you what does that mean ?
Roger
It’s a technical problem from the source. Try to delete the friend you have in common from snapchat and don’t add him, let him add you again.
In that way you will be deleating the common friend you have, and add him again newly with no relation.
So the technical problem will be overcomed.Roger Snarvu
From information technology.
UK, 2475Kelly
I want to know what happened with this guy lol. Are yall married now or did he fly away? TELL ME please
Anna
Oh my goodness. This conversation is depressing. Letting some man use you as a FWB is letting him look at you one way only- for sex and that is offensive naturally to anyone’s ego. The reason why there is no such thing as casual is because it’s impossible. Why do ppl keep trying this? Emotions=being human. We’re not animals we can’t detach or feelings from our experiences like that. This guy has been playing me and I wanted a relationship and he does the same thing to me. Honey, just find yourself something worth having feelings about because no matter what you tell yourself you’re always gonna want more than “casual”. Men that want FWB’s are disgusting. I wash my hands of them.. Ya’ll deserve more respect from a guy. anyways that’s my opinion but if you feel diff. you’re entitled. I just think you guys should have higher standards because otherwise you’ll just find yourself in a mess. Which is really what I’ve been going thru. Just my opinion, not trying to step on toes lol
llockk
Old post I know, but I thought I would share anyway. The same thing happened to me, Im a male though and the female told me we shouldn’t talk anymore but is always the first person to view my snap stories lol. I deleted her number, and don’t care if she views my stories. She can see what she missed out on for all I care.
Delicia
I’m sorry I know this is old but the girl sound obsessed. She lying and she want more. He is no longer interested cause he got what he want. Bottom line women could never be like men.
Rae
Casual is casual . I never even heard of exclusively casual . I personally , think he is playing games . He was partially honest about his expectations . He wants to hit you up on his time and I’m sure he casually talking to other girls . I would end all contact with him . I would snap it up meaning be on snapchat all I want and if you want to take it to another level delete him . I had a guy treat me the same way . he looks at everything and wants me to stop what I’m doing to attend to him . Red flag That’s a guy who talks to a lot of girls telling them the same thing . He doesn’t like your snaps . He is trying to see what your doing . I would ignore him !! He doesn’t want anything serious but he wants to put stipulations on it lol 😂 He is full of crap .
Peggy
Anna nailed it IMO.
Karine
Hi Tessa,
My situation is very similar to yours. I met a guy on tinder and we started to hook up on a regular basis. We were both clear that it’s only casual, but he started to ask about my personal life (especially my past relationships) and acted in a way that couples would do (e.g. lap sitting at his house party, nose taping, hold hands, grab my arm around his waist, hold his hand on my face and call me cute), which made me think that he might like me.
However he acted differently after I bumped into his female friend (ex-partner) and I was pissed at the fact that his housemate accidently leaked out they were still having sex. So then I asked him to be exclusive to me even though it’s only casual and he agreed.
HOWEVER! Ever since that night, he started to ignore my message either on sms or snapchat. I can see him opened the message but just not reply. Also he does not initiate to ask me to come over but seems to be waiting for me to ask him. When I ask for a hookup, he would reply sexually as if I’m desperate and needy. I feel disrespected and not in control at all.
Ever since then we finish hooking up, we don’t contact at all and I start to wonder if he’s lost interested. He reads my snap stories whilst ignoring my messages, and he posts facebook updates but ignored mt friend request.The most confusing part is that he is not pushing me away, or say cutting this off because he still sees me when I call him. But he just wouldn’t contact me as if he’s lost interested.
I think he was trying to put me off so that he keeps control and can cut this off whenever he wants before he finds someone new to hook up with.
What I did was that I cut him out before he did that. I could not stand a stressful casual relationship no matter how much I liked him on bed (he is the best I’ve ever met).However I did not block any future possibility that we could still hook up, we both agreed that we may still meet each other sometime in the future. The difference between me and you (Tessa), is that I and him are not really friends so I don’t risk a friendship here. Also, the fact that us and our mutual friends get along quite well does not affect our relationship because we agreed that we can still hang out with friends in the future.
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